The family systems theory has a significant revelation on family relations. I firmly
agree that to understand a particular family or a member, they should be around other
family members. The emotional connection among different family members may create
functional or dysfunctional coexistence, which is not easy to identify when an individual
is further from the other members. Taking an example of the extended family, the
relationship between the mother-in-law and her daughter-in-law may be tense, but once
they are outside the family, they can pretend to have a good relationship. Therefore, I
agree with the theory that the existing emotional attachment and developed culture in
the family is distinctively understood when the family is together.
The triangle emotions concept explains the cause of disagreements in a family of
three people where two of them may agree with an idea with one other in conflict. I
agree with the concept because it gives a source of the most common family
disagreements and fights, especially amongst siblings. It can become a great challenge
and a cause for a tense relationship between three relatives, because one member may
end up feeling unrecognized since the majority always wins. In a single-parent family,
two children may have a disagreement and the mother is expected to agree with only
one of them. This creates sibling rivalry because they all want to be right and supported
by their parent. The assumption about this concept is that one party has to be right.
However, one person in conflict might be on the right track, but it becomes impossible to
implement the opinion. Therefore, I think the theory only explains the degrees of family
differences but with no remedy on a method that can create a stronger family bond.
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I resolutely disagree with the emotional cut-off concept of family theory. The idea
explains that an individual may distance themselves from the family members with
whom they are not in a good relationship. This helps reduce family conflicts, stress, and
other emotional problems. However, it is not true that cutting off links with their family
based on such reasons might cause more stress. I have seen people who distanced
themselves from toxic family relationships create better families and other relationships
far away from their past family lives. They are not stressed since the stressors – which
were from family interpersonal and emotional conflicts – are no longer with them, and
they end up forgiving, forgetting, and letting go the bitterness, hurt, and anxiety.
Emotional cut-off from toxic family relations relieves an individual the occasional
disagreements, stress, anxiety, and burden. It does not make them bitter in the future.
I believe that a family that has cultivated a culture of good communication,
respect, honesty, intelligence, love, and kindness among other virtues may come out
strong despite the emotional interdependence among the members. Understanding
each other’s personality and reactions help build a functional family union without the
conflicts. However, staying together for a long time may be a reason for disagreements
and disputes. It is, therefore, better to have personal space for coexistence because the
emotional connectedness will always put the members together even when they are far
from each other. The family systems theory explains more about family emotional
imbalances through the triangular emotions, self-differentiation, and emotional cut-off
among other concepts. The theory helps analyze family systems by examining the
existing function-ability and dysfunctions and explaining them through emotional
reliance.
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